Tony Stark Never Read Black Butler (Except For That One Time, Maybe)
by coulsonlivesandfurylies
Summary: Tony Stark does NOT read manga, and JARVIS is one HELL of a butler. (Features crash course in Black Butler, if needed)


**Black Butler Crash Course:**

Black Butler, or Kuroshitsuji as it is known in it's original language, is a 16 volumed manga taking place in Victorian England. It's premise is that a young boy loses both his parents and makes a deal with a demon to avenge their deathes. The demon takes a physical form of an adult butler, who will serve the orphan until he successfully avenges the loss of his parents. As every good manga character has to have a catchphrase, the demon butlers is "I am one HELL of a butler."

* * *

"I truly do not care what you guys think. JARVIS is not something out of 1984 that watches your ever move. He is simply a butler," Tony stated, looking around the kitchen at the various members of the Avengers.

They all had their morning rituals. Bruce made breakfast (and really, who knew that the guy could cook?). Either Tony or Natasha would make a pot of coffee, industrial strength with the coffee grounds still in. The two would have a cup, than Steve would come down, pour himself a cup, either or frown or sigh, and then pour out the remains and make another pot. Clint was always the last to wake, and, despite Steve's protests, would drink about two cans of Mountain Dew. If Thor was around, he'd have a cup of coffee and clean up the kitchen when everyone else was done. Otherwise, clean up was left to Cap.

Today, Bruce was making pancakes, Steve was pouring out the pot of coffee that Natasha had made earlier, and Clint was half way though his first can of Mountain Dew and had yet to say a word.

Tony wasn't quite sure how this conversation had started. He thought it had something to do with a comment Cap had made about JARVIS being British, which had sent Tony off into a whole rant about how the AI was perfect in every way.

Well, almost every way. The snark the AI had was of the charts.

"Tony, I wasn't trying to insult your robot," Cap said as he pressed some buttons on the 'percolator' as he called it.

"He is NOT a robot. He is artificial intelligence. And he is one HELL of a butler."

Clint nearly did a spit-take.

"Did you really just quote that anime about the demon butler?" Clint asked, sounding incredulous.

"I was quoting its pure form, the manga named Black Butler, or Kuroshitsuji if you prefer its original title."

"So, I'll take that as a yes. Man, I didn't know you were into that stuff! I always think of it being only emo teens that read that shit," Clint replied, his grin meaning that he would most likely be using this for blackmail in the future.

"Actually, manga is a far more advanced version of our comic books," Bruce commented, a ghost of a smile crossing his lips. "It can also teach lessons. I read one that managed to create a rather accurate depiction of social classes and their separation in Victorian London."

"And then there are ones that talk about demonic butlers. You're right Bruce; insanely educational," Clint replied, smirking at the doctor.

"Every genre has its flaws. Look at those spy novels you love, Clint. How much of the things the characters in those books do could actually happen?" Natasha asked quietly.

"Ok, I'll give you that. But Aaron Cross is totally factual. I could do all of that shit that guy does."

"I think you guys are missing the point," Tony said. "I totally never read them!"

"Then why do you have all sixteen volumes in your library?" Natasha asked rhetorically.

"Uhh… Pepper! She really loved them!" Tony replied, trying to cover his ass.

The rest of the group simply chuckled.

* * *

"JARVIS, wake up," Tony muttered as he entered his lab.

"As you wish, Sir."

"Thanks."

"Of course. And, Sir?"

"Yes, JARVIS?"

"Your assumption is most accurate."

"What assumption is this?"

"I am one HELL of a butler."

* * *

**A.N.**

I just randomly came up with this idea tonight while I was sitting in my uncles living room reading another Avengers fanfic. I quite liked the idea, and was inspired to type up this quick little piece.

I've only read the first volume of Black Butler, so pardon me if I don't have my facts straight.

The Victorian manga Bruce references does exist, and is one of my all time favorites. It's called Emma, and is written by Kaoru Mori. It is brilliant and everyone should read it once. You can find it and Black Butler at various manga sights online.


End file.
